30.11.09

One more, one less.

'It always fascinates me how people go from loving you madly to nothing at all...nothing'



'Well yes, i'll bump into him, and we'll meet our new boyfriend/girlfriend and we'll act as if we were never together. Then we'll slowly think of each other less and less until we forget each other completely (almost). It's always the same for me, break up, break down, drink up, fool around, meet one guy, then another to forget the one and only. Then after a few months of total emptiness start to look again for true love, desperately look everywhere. And after two years of loneliness meet a new love and swear it is the one, until that one is gone as well..."

yeah.

Shame is the name (of the game)



Gave in and bought the Dolce Vita boots i'd been watching for quite some time since they were on sale, sort of ($20 off $220 doesn't help much) Pretty accurate photo of what they'll look like on me since I'm always clad in black tights and horribly pigeon toed. Final project for my Illustrator concept class (my major class) was given today at 5:30pm and is due at 1:30pm tomorrow. I wish I could complain about the 19hr time frame i'm expected to complete this in, but this is what my jobs will be like for the rest of my life. Although, as someone who procrastinates often and is late always, i'm used to being in a rush. A toast, to my frantic future.

Love comes close but chooses to spare me.



Can't stop listening to this record. This song is obnoxiously catchy(apparently it's in a radio shack commercial?) and the rest of the album does it for me simply with the seeming re-incarnation of ian curtis on vocals. This weekend has left me feeling good and bad at the same time, and I can't decided how I feel now. I should be doing homework. Last week of class-then it's work work work. Strange to think that nxne was in june. Feels like a few weeks ago.


All work and no play makes Catherine a dumb blonde. (what?)

23.11.09

I JUST DIED.

for this fucking ring! i've been looking for two/three/four fingered rings exactly like this, but they've all been so expensive. H&M spring can't come soon enough! look out eaton centre, i'm going to be calling you asking for this everyday. Hi, can I get an accessories check please?

20.11.09

HE'S SOMETHIN' ELSE.

Why don't they make boys that look like this anymore? In my fantasy world, they are lots of them. They all live in new york, have a propensity towards smoking, drinking, puppies, and small insecure blonde girls...

17.11.09

Got no salvation.

I was planning to wait, but decided fuck it, and downloaded the leek Fame Monster.
Absolutely adore this track-favourite from the album hands down.


16.11.09

No more dreaming like a girl so in love with the wrong world.

Felt it in my fist, in my feet, in the hollows of my eyelids, shaking through my skull, through my spine and down through my ribs.

I can't stop watching this video/listening to this song. I adore everything about it. I also can't seem to stop obsessing over wolves-every dream I'm able to remember, they make an appearance at some point (which I think as far as dream interpretations go, I should find this troubling but I do not)


Sometimes I ask myself why I even bother keeping a blog. I take comfort in the fact that no one really reads it. But I also become paranoid over how i'm portraying myself. I've never been good at letting anyone get to know me, and i'm afraid that because of my reluctance to let anyone in, that a strange distorted image of me is projected everywhere that has very little truth behind it. This is my fear: people seeing me differently than the way I am. And car accidents.Every time I open my mouth, I give too much of myself away. I understand how immature it must seem to wonder the way strangers or acquaintances see you, judge you. But when you live alone, there are hours that turn into days of nothing except thoughts, that can turn into suspicions, that can turn into insecurities, that already existed if you happen to be a perfectionist. Which I do. Solidarity is equally good and bad for me.

Ps. I had $32 worth of empties the other day.


yeah.

Through a glass darkly.

I love my laptop case. Adore it, even. I'm an apple advocate through and through, and I love that the (for the most part) the accessories that you can find for apple products are designed with equal amounts of functionality and atheistic appeal. For example, my ACMEMADE macbook pro case.



It has everything you'd expect from a simple, slim softcase. It is also, very pretty, fuzzy grey flannel. I don't think they're available from apple (but they should be) I got mine from the OCAD book/computer store. acmemade.com

12.11.09

I'm a fool to want you.

To want a love that can't be true, a love that's there for others too. I'm a fool to hold you, such a fool to hold you. To seek a kiss not mine alone, to share a kiss the Devil has known. Time and time again I said I'd leave you, time and time again I went away. But then would come the time when I would need you, and once again these words I'd have to say. I'm a fool to want you. Pity me, I need you. I know it's wrong, it must be wrong. But right or wrong I can't get along

without you





All I can think about is whether you even notice I'm not around. You didn't fight for me to stay. You never asked me to reconsider. You let me go as if you had never written 'You mean the world to me'. Because if that were remotely true you would have done something...anything...anything other than watch me walk away. It's only been eight days(but who's counting) since I spoke to you and we only exchanged five words(but who's counting) and I'm just trying to understand how I'm supposed to get through the rest.

Step into the darkness.

Thought i'd show you a little bit of where I live, since I spend so much time here. There are a lot of things I want to do to my place still (I don't feel as though i've moved in entirely)
My hallway, to my bathroom and my hallway closet.


My front entrance, shoe rack, artwork I found in a bar


Hallway closet featuring my nine loop scarves (yes they're all necessary despite the fact they're all black and grey)


My bathroom and my fake plant


Mirror and Morrissey


More bathroom


One of my favourite parts of my apartment-the doorknob in my bathroom.


Main view of my bachelor


Window ledge


Bedside, slight view into my kitchen


And my expedit unit.


I'll post the rest of my place later perhaps. I find it really interesting to see inside where people live, hopefully this was mildly amusing for you.

10.11.09

I WANT YOUR VERTIGO STICK.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! Handjob motion dance moves? This is why I love you. Also, I now have about a million more costume ideas for halloween next year (that's right, I might go as lady gaga again)

9.11.09

BARBALERT.



JUSTINBOBBY WITH MORRISSEY HAIR? WHAT THE FUCK IS UP. TAKE ME FOR A RIDE.



(on your motorcycle, of course)

6.11.09

nature is an archaic word that could never ecplain this mess.

Feel yourself sinking down into it, enfolding you....it's a nice feeling, isn't it? What you feel is a pleasant warmth, and heaviness.



Absolutely love charlotte gainsbourg. This film seems amazingly dark and haunting.

5.11.09

No more dreaming of the dead as if death itself was undone.

Oh. My. God. Is this not the most beautiful turquoise ring you've ever seen on the face of the planet? I need it, and the saks website has them for pre-order. It may be a bit pricey but I consider a YSL ring such as this as an art investment. There are also a few on e-bay...Good thing christmas is around the corner!

3.11.09

...because you're mine.




I just DIED for these shoes. No hyperbole whatsoever. I litterally died. I'm dead. Yeah.

1.11.09

Samhain.

Dark Theme Video from Aritzia on Vimeo.



Happy Hallowe'en. My favourite of the entire year.